We are conditioned in our modern society to look for the silver lining in every crappy day. For some things, this is fine. But when it comes to extreme loss and pain, there often isn’t a silver lining, or bright side.
Some things just suck. Period.
Instead of asking the bereaved to find that silver lining, consider sitting with them in acknowledgement of their very genuine pain.
You might be surprised at how much that helps.
Notes for the Support Team – Words Matter:
Original statement: Look on the bright side.
Rewritten: I know that nothing can lessen or make up for this enormous loss, and so I won’t try to point you to any bright side. Instead I will simply be here. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Miranda’s Blog: When you’re going through tough times, remember that life is about so much more than feel-good messages you read online
Miranda’s Blog: The Phone call you never expect to receive; Supporting a loved one after the loss of a child
Miranda’s Blog: Not Okay
Miranda’s Blog: I Drink a Lot of Tea