It is common when we see someone in pain to want to want to take that pain away; to make them “better”.
I can’t speak for everyone here, but I think something that isn’t realized about loss is that pain after loss is sometimes important; it’s a measure of the strength of the love that remains.
I certainly valued and still value my pain.
So instead of wanting to take it away, consider instead giving it a place. Listen without judgement. Let your loved one’s complicated feelings exist.
Notes for the Support Team; Words Matter:
Original statement: I wish I could take your pain away.
Rewritten: I understand your feelings are important. I would never want to minimize or try to take them away. I will always be here to listen.