009 – 33w2d
June 1, 2018
This week was hard, but it put some things into perspective for me. I’m going to meet you soon, and our lives are about to change in the most wonderful way.
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Baby Ava Rayne
![It's a common question the bereaved experience after loss, particularly if or when a loss may have been preventable:
"Why didn't you..."
It's also a form of distancing; of inserting a barrier in the conversation.
"Why didn't you [insert second-guessing statement here]?
𝘐 would have [insert action].
…(and so this would never have happened 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦)."
And while I understand why you think or say these kinds of things, I need you to understand how very much your words are not helpful.
It's easy to second-guess a situation when you are looking back on it from the outside. It's easy to think or say you would have done things differently, but you don't know for certain.
Nobody knows how they would react to any given situation until they are in the midst of it. And yet people ask these questions anyway.
Please don't.
~
#WordsMatterInSupportAfterLoss
#AJHGraphics #NotesForTheSupportTeam #WordsMatter #LifeAfterLoss #SupportAfterLoss #HowToHelp #HowCanIHelp #SupportTeam #SecondGuessing #ImSorryForYourLoss](https://859537.smushcdn.com/1874986/wp-content/plugins/instagram-feed/img/placeholder.png?lossy=1&strip=1&webp=1)