Adrian's Elephant
Graphics Blog

Sometimes memes encapsulate our feelings better than any other forms of expression.

Adrian's Elephant
Graphics Blog

Sometimes memes encapsulate our feelings better than any other forms of expression.

I started making memes and graphics in 2019 as a means of sharing thoughts about the child loss experience. This quickly expanded into other aspects of loss, grief, and life:

Graphics Blog for Child Loss & Grief
Graphics Blog for Grieving Without God
Graphics Blog for Informed Pregnancy
Graphics Blog for Life & Authenticity
Graphics Blog for Pregnancy & Parenting After Loss

You can view graphics according to subject areas above, or simply scroll down. Please click, download, and share. Tags are always appreciated: Adrian’s Elephant on Instagram | Adrian’s Mother on Facebook and Twitter.

-Miranda Hernandez, Adrian’s Mother 💙

Graphics Sorted by Title

Graphics for Child Loss & Grief

“A Stillborn”

"At least" is an invalidator.

“At least” is an invalidator (B/W; 2 versions)

informed pregnancy graphics babies come when they're ready

“Babies come when they’re ready” (3 versions)

"Be thankful for the good times." …What in the world makes you think I'm not?

“Be thankful for the good times” (B/W)

It is important to understand that the most "biologically normal" thing in the world is death.

“Biologically Normal” (B/W)

"But you have a beautiful daughter now." Rewritten: I'm sorry for your loss.

“But You Have a Beautiful Daughter Now”

Dead is not a dirty word.

“Dead” is not a dirty word (B/W)

"Grief is a passage, not a place to stay." Rewritten: Grief IS.

“Grief is a Passage”

"Healing" from grief is about as likely as regrowing a missing limb.

“Healing” from Grief

"Healing" from the death of my loved one is about as likely as regrowing a missing limb.

“Healing” from the death of my loved one or child (2 versions)

I can't imagine - Downloadable Graphics for Child Loss & Grief

“I can’t imagine” (3 versions)

"I know how you feel." Rewritten: I don't know how you feel, but I'm here to listen.

“I know how you feel” (2 versions)

Notes for the Support Team - Words Matter: Original statement: I wish I could take your pain away.  Rewritten: I understand your feelings are important. I would never want to minimize or try to take them away. I will always be here to listen.

“I wish I could take your pain away”

"I would never survive it." I never had a choice.

“I would never survive it”

"It's going to be okay" Rewritten: It really sucks…and I'm here for you.

“It’s going to be okay” (2 versions)

"It's okay to not be okay as long as you don't stay that way" Rewritten: It's okay to not be okay.

“It’s okay to not be okay as long as you don’t stay that way” (color options)

"Look on the Bright Side." Rewritten: This sucks.

“Look on the bright side”

"Positive vibes only."...Rewritten: Authentic vibes only.

“Positive Vibes Only”

What's with this expectation that grief should be "reasonable"? Death certainly isn't very reasonable. Grieve however you need.

“Reasonable” Grief (B/W)

Notes for the Support Team -  When someone is in the thick of grief, "someday" is pretty meaningless. Sit with them in the hard parts, today, instead.

“Someday” is Meaningless

"Think positive"...I am positive my son is dead.

“Think Positive” (B/W)

Trauma is not your fault, but healing is your responsibility. Rewritten: Trauma is not your fault.

“Trauma is not your fault, but healing is your responsibility”

Why don't you "just"… Rewritten: Just don't say this

“Why don’t you “just”…”

"You're so brave." I never had a choice.

“You’re so brave”

"You're so strong." Inside I am dying.

“You’re so strong” (3 versions)

Bereaved Life Graphics for Child Loss & Grief

Bereaved Live in the Real World

Notes for the Support Team: Children aren't replaceable. - Miranda Hernandez, Adrian's Mother

Children Aren’t Replaceable

Dear Prenatal Provider Informed Pregnancy Downloadable Graphics

Dear Prenatal Provider

Death changes you…Permanently.

Death Changes You

Death isn't something you ever "get over". It's something you integrate, and then integrate again.

Death isn’t something you ever “get over” (B/W)

Gentle wishes for bereaved dads on Fathers Day. May the day be kind.

Father’s Day

You are under no obligation to be healed not today, and not at any point in the future. It is always always ALWAYS okay not to be okay.

Feelings are Always Valid (B/W & Color; Multiple Versions)

Feelings are always valid, - Even when they aren't rational - Even when they are negative - Even when other people wish you felt differently Feelings are ALWAYS valid

Feelings are always valid (B/W)

Forced positivity is toxic.

Forced Positivity is Toxic (color options)

"Good intentions" are best revealed by changing behavior you've been told is hurtful.

Good intentions

If you ask a widow about the worst kind of grief, they are going to say it's losing a spouse. If you ask a bereaved parent about the worst kind of grief, they are going to say it's losing a child.  And they are both correct. Grief is not a competition.

Grief is not a Competition (B/W; multiple versions)

Grief isn't sadness. Grief isn't loss. Grief is what lives in those left behind. 

Grief is not Sadness (2 versions)

I think one of the hardest things I had to do was accept that grief isn't always overwhelming. Sometimes it just exists, present but not always screaming.

Grief isn’t always overwhelming (B/W)

I have grown as a person since the death of my son. But I would give up everything I've gained to have not had a reason to.

Growing through tragedy (B/W; 2 versions)

If a bereaved parent feels guilt or blame about their loss, simply telling them not to feel that way is not a solution.

Guilt, Fault, & Blame

I am thoroughly uninterested in being "strong."

I am thoroughly uninterested in being “strong”

I have the right to feel how I feel, for as long as I feel it, regardless of circumstances or whether someone else feels differently.

I have the right to feel how I feel (B/W)

I miss the days when I still believed all you needed was a good attitude.

I miss the days when I still believed all you needed was a good attitude

I don't talk about my son's death because I'm having trouble coping. I talk about my son's death because I don't know anyone else to end up like me. Please don't try to silence me. My story is as valid and as important as anyone else's.

I talk about Adrian’s death because I don’t want it to happen to you (B/W)

I too used to believe tragedy was the thing that happened to other people.

I too used to believe tragedy was the thing that happened to other people.

I'm upset with movies and TV shows for making me think grief was just a phase.

I’m upset with movies and TV shows for making me think grief was just a phase (B/W)

If you truly want to comfort a grieving person, remove these words from your vocabulary: "But", "Strong", "Brave", and "At Least"

If you truly want to comfort a bereaved person, remove these words from your vocabulary

Notes for the Bereaved - It is not your job to make other people feel comfortable.

It’s not your job to make other people feel comfortable

My Experience Going Overdue in Pregnancy (Brochure)

My Feelings are Authentic Graphics for Child Loss & Grief

My Feelings Are Authentic (color options)

My pain has a purpose Graphics for Child Loss & Grief

My pain has a purpose

What is safe is not always natural & What is natural is not always safe.

Natural VS. Safe

Quote: Sharing about my deceased child doesn't mean that I'm stuck or broken or even that I am hurting. It simply means I am a parent.

Parenting in Loss (color options)

how are you? Graphics for Child Loss & Grief

Please don’t ask me how I’m doing unless you’re prepared to hear the truth

Positivity is a choice, and not one you can make for other people

Positivity is a choice, and not one you can make for other people

Prayer Is Appreciated…When it has been invited

Prayer is appreciated…when it has been invited

Public Service Announcement: Back Up Your Photos

Public Service Announcement: Back Up Your Photos

My experience feels a lot more valid when I remove all the "buts".

Remove the “Buts” (B/W)

Sometimes it just needs to suck.

Sometimes it Just Needs to Suck

Sometimes there is genuinely nothing to be thankful for.

Sometimes there is nothing to be thankful for

Sometimes, I'm just tired Graphics for Child Loss & Grief

Sometimes, I’m just — tired

Graphics for Child Loss & Grief survivors bias

Stillbirth is “Rare” (multiple versions)

Graphics for Child Loss & Grief survivors bias

Survivor’s Bias

Thankfulness is not a "cure" for grief.

Thankfulness is not a “Cure” for Grief (color options)

Thankfulness is not a cure for tragedy, trauma, or grief.

Thankfulness is not a cure for grief (B/W; 2 versions)

Even as a bereaved parent, I still don't always know the right words to say.

The Bereaved Don’t Always Have Words Either

Even as a bereaved parent, I still don't always know the right words to say.

The Bereaved Don’t Always Have Words Either

The body keeps a calendar completely separate from the mind. Some days just have to be felt.

The Body Keeps a Calendar (B/W)

There is no "just" about the process of adoption

There is no “just” about the process of adoption

There's no such thing as "just" a miscarriage.

There’s no such thing as “just” a miscarriage (B/W)

They said time heals. They lied.

They said time heals. They lied. (B/W)

Tragedy is not a one-time event

Tragedy is not a one-time event

Quote: You may find it "triggering" to hear about the death of my child. Imagine how much harder it is to live with it.

Trigger Warning

What doesn't kill you…Still hurts like a bitch

What doesn’t kill you… (3 versions)

Yes, you can parent a child even after their death. #seaglassparenting

Yes, you can parent a child even after their death (B/W)

You are under no obligation to be healed not today, and not at any point in the future. It is always always ALWAYS okay not to be okay.

You are under no obligation to be healed

Notes for the Support Team -  You aren't going to be perfect. Show up anyway.

You aren’t going to be perfect. Show Up Anyway.

Collections of Posts on Special Topics

Title: Thoughts on Natural Birth | overlaid on image of Miranda's maternity photo with Adrian (Modern Lux Photography)
Title: Pregnancy After Loss | overlaid on image of Miranda's belly and Adrian's footprints (Two Little Starfish Photography)
Title: Postpartum Body After Loss | overlaid on image of Miranda's belly in Waimea Canyon, Kaua'i (Luna Kai Photography)
Title: People & Relationships | overlaid on image of bench in Winnipeg, British Columbia (Miranda Hernandez)
Title: Parenting After Loss | overlaid on image of Peanut's hands and Adrian's elephant (Miranda Hernandez)
Title: Mental Health After Loss | overlaid on image of Miranda and Adrian's elephant on the California coast (Synch Media)
Title: Guilt, Fault, & Blame | overlaid on image of fountain in San Francisco (Miranda Hernandez)
Title: Grieving Without God | overlaid on image of Miranda on the California coast (Synch Media)
Title: Grief Positivity | overlaid on image of the full moon (Miranda Hernandez)
Title: Grief Olympics or Comparing Grief | overlaid on image of sunset over Lake Tahoe (Miranda Hernandez)
Title: Financial Matters After Loss | overlaid on image of waterlilies (Miranda Hernandez)
Title: Death Positivity | overlaid on image of sunset over Kaua'i, Hawai'i (Miranda Hernandez)
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