For Adrian’s first birthday, I planned a memorial event. I booked a beautiful outdoor space and sent formal invitations to my friends and family.
Three weeks prior to the event, and almost no one had RSVP’d, not even to say no.
These things are hard for the bereaved. It’s hard to feel like people don’t understand your connection and honor and love for your child. It’s hard to put so much energy into trying to bridge that gap with people and have them ignore or even deride your efforts.
Grief is hard, both for the bereaved and those on the outside. But however uncomfortable you feel, think about the impact of your actions and your words.
You don’t have to understand to support.
And your support means everything.
Notes for the Support Team – Words Matter:
Original Statement: Having a birthday party for a dead child is weird.
Rewritten: I’ve never been to a birthday party for a deceased child, but I’d love to honor him in this way. How can I help?