009 – 33w2d

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Sat, May 6, 2017 at 6:51 PM

It’s been a hard week, little one. I debated telling you this, but I think you deserve to hear the bad as well as the good. Life is a balancing act, and I want you to know I will always be there to help you through any hardship.

I found out this week that an old coworker of mine died by suicide while at work with the California Highway Patrol. We weren’t close, and I don’t know why it happened, but it’s been a sad week for everyone who knew him. I know we all wonder if there was something we could have done to reach him earlier, to let him know he wasn’t alone. You, my love, will never be alone. I love you so much!

The second thing that happened this week was also hard to bear. My cousin Caleb* lost his baby, Ava Rayne, at just 10 weeks old. We don’t know what happened with her either, and I feel very sad because Caleb and I were never close. I want to change that. I want him to know that I am here, and I want us all to stay in contact and be a family. I want this for you.

This week was hard, but it put some things into perspective for me. I’m going to meet you soon, and our lives are about to change in the most wonderful way. I promise to tell you every day that I love you, and I’m here for you, and you are so very special to me. I hope you in turn know that you can trust me, and know that I will always work for what is best for you and our family. You are the very best part of my world.

I love you.

~
* Names have been changed to protect privacy.

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Letters to Adrian are real letters from a mother to her stillborn child. Letters are shared here in periodic batches.

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Koloa, Kaua'i, Hawai'i - Feature

017 – Thu, Jul 6, 2017 at 6:24 AM

Pier, Paihia, New Zealand (Miranda Hernandez)

042 – Mon, Oct 2, 2017, 6:14 PM

Bike path in California (Miranda Hernandez)

098 – Thu, Apr 29, 2018, 8:58 PM

024 – Wed, Aug 2, 2017 at 6:13 PM

Esquimalt Lagoon, Victoria, British Columbia, Canada (Miranda Hernandez)

037 – Tue, Sep 26, 2017 at 3:02 PM

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071 – Mon, Dec 25, 2017, 6:45 PM

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101 – Sun, May 6, 2018, 12:13 AM

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067 – Tue, Dec 12, 2017, 9:42 PM

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108 – Sat, May 26, 2018, 11:02 AM

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115 – Sat, Jun 30, 2018, 1:03 AM

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063 – Sun, Nov 26, 2017, 9:45 AM

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021 – Thu, Jul 20, 2017 at 6:24 AM

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094 – Fri, Apr 6, 2018, 11:46 PM

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096 – Tue, Apr 24, 2018, 11:09 PM

Miranda and Adrian's Elephant on the California coast (photo used with permission)

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059 – Wed, Nov 15, 2017, 7:52 PM

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058 – Tue, Nov 14, 2017, 7:10 PM

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072 – Sat, Dec 30, 2017, 10:51 AM

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Waves on Lake Tahoe, California (Miranda Hernandez)

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116 – Sat, Jun 30, 2018, some time in the morning

026 – Sun, Aug 13, 2017 at 6:17 AM

018 – Sun, Jul 9, 2017 at 1:32 PM

Rocks on the California Coast (Miranda Hernandez)

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Sunrise over the Pacific Ocean 2 - Feature

015 – Sun, Jul 2, 2017 at 8:19 PM

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035 – Tue, Sep 26, 2017 at 11:09 AM

Pacific Ocean - Feature

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Full moon in Texas (Miranda Hernandez)

083 – Mon, Jan 29, 2018, 5:09 AM

Wildflowers in Big Sur, California (Miranda Hernandez)

090 – Sat, Feb 24, 2018, 5:12 AM

Winter in Chicago, Illinois (Miranda Hernandez)

097 – Wed, Apr 28, 2018, 11:08 PM

Stream, North Lake Tahoe, California (Miranda Hernandez)

046 – Sun, Oct 15, 2017, 8:09 PM

001 – Hello

Adrian's necklace on bluebonnets, California coast (Miranda Hernandez)

138 – Thu, Feb 6, 2020, 11:39 AM

Keālia Beach, Kaua'i, Hawai'i (Miranda Hernandez)

040 – Thu, Sep 28, 2017 at 5:43 PM

Painted rock found on the Haruru Falls trail, Waitanga, New Zealand (Miranda Hernandez)

123 – Wed, Aug 29, 2018, 3:16 PM

Koloa, Kaua'i, Hawai'i (Miranda Hernandez)

092 – Tue, Mar 20, 2018, 2:26 PM

Climbing vines on Hatley Castle, Victoria, British Columbia (Miranda Hernandez)

137 – Tue, Dec 31, 2019, 10:01 PM

Miranda and Adrian's Elephant (Miranda Hernandez)

077 – Fri, Jan 12, 2018, 2:38 PM

019 – Sun, Jul 16, 2017 at 12:17 PM

Sunset on the California coast (Miranda Hernandez)

079 – Wed, Jan 17, 2018, 4:24 PM

View through the plants on the Haruru Falls trail, Waitanga, New Zealand (Miranda Hernandez)

118 – Fri, Jul 6, 2018, 7:43 PM

Dark and moody sunset over the ocean in Kaua'i, Hawai'i (Miranda Hernandez)

027 – Mon, Aug 14, 2017 at 12:15 PM

Miranda's feet in the sand, New Smyrna Beach, Florida (Miranda Hernandez)

124 – Tue, Sep 4, 2018, 9:00 PM

033 – Tue, Sep 19, 2017 at 6:35 PM

View through the plants on the Haruru Falls trail, Waitanga, New Zealand (Miranda Hernandez)

119 – Wed, Jul 18, 2018, 1:10 PM

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109 – Sun, May 27, 2018, 8:35 PM

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060 – Fri, Nov 17, 2017, 8:02 PM

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Miranda and Adrian's Elephant at Pinecrest Lake

069 – Sat, Dec 23, 2017, 7:22 PM

Daisies (Miranda Hernandez)

091 – Sun, Mar 11, 2018, 1:10 PM

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093 – Wed, Mar 21, 2018, 4:18 PM

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122 – Tue, Jul 24, 2018, 9:28 PM

Miranda and Adrian's Elephant

100 – Sat, May 5, 2018, 5:30 PM

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113 – Sun, Jun 24, 2018, 1:02 AM

Miranda and Adrian's Elephant on the California coast (photo used with permission)

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087 – Wed, Feb 7, 2018, 4:16 PM

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Miranda and Adrian's Elephant on the California coast (Miranda Hernandez)

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More Letters

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127 – Thu, May 2, 2019, 12:03 PM

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112 – Sat, Jun 16, 2018, 3:59 PM

Adrian James 3 - Feaure

016 – Wed, Jul 5, 2017 at 6:58 AM

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066 – Mon, Dec 11, 2017, 8:16 PM

004 – 12w1d – Your Tiny Feet

002 – 7w3d – Pickles and ice cream?

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041 – Sat, Sep 30, 2017 at 8:30 PM

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057 – Tue, Nov 14, 2017, 6:28 PM

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132 – Mon, Jul 1, 2019, 9:45 PM

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056 – Fri, Nov 10, 2017, 8:29 PM

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107 – Sat, May 19, 2018, 2:02 PM

Close up of metallic artwork in rustic red blending into blues and greens, found in California (Miranda Hernandez)

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025 – Sun, Aug 6, 2017 at 12:26 AM

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070 – Sat, Dec 23, 2017, 9:12 PM

Miranda and Adrian's Elephant at Northstar California Resort

089 – Sat, Feb 17, 2018, 3:55 PM

View from the venue for Adrian's memorial (Miranda Hernandez)

114 – Sun, Jun 24, 2018, 1:15 PM

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051 – Tue, Oct 31, 2017, 5:32 PM

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Keālia Beach, Kaua’i, Hawai’i (Miranda Hernandez)

106 – Fri, May 18, 2018, 6:18 PM

Keālia Beach, Kaua'i, Hawai'I (Miranda Hernandez)

039 – Thu, Sep 28, 2017 at 4:16 PM

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038 – Thu, Sep 28, 2017 at 9:36 AM

Wildflowers in Victoria, British Columbia, Canada (Miranda Hernandez)

036 – Tue, Sep 26, 2017 at 1:59 PM

005 – 19w6d – Happy New Year

Staircase in California (Miranda Hernandez)

111 – Sun, Jun 10, 2018, 9:31 PM

Sunset over Victoria - Feature

023 – Fri, Jul 28, 2017 at 5:18 PM

California coast in Big Sur, California (Miranda Hernandez)

110 – Sun, Jun 3, 2018, 9:11 AM

Shadows on a hike, California (Miranda Hernandez)

044 – Thu, Oct 12, 2017, 6:52 PM

Flowers in Assiniboine Park, Winnipeg, Manitoba (Miranda Hernandez)

133 – Wed, Jul 3, 2019, 11:32 AM

Clouds, San Antonio (Skydive Lone Star) https://skydivelonestar.com/

048 – Sat, Oct 21, 2017, 8:37 PM

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086 – Tue, Feb 6, 2018, 3:52 PM

Wooden structure in South Lake Tahoe, California (Miranda Hernandez)

136 – Thu, Sep 12, 2019, 6:40 PM

Walkway on the Haruru Falls trail, Waitanga, New Zealand (Miranda Hernandez)

120 – Thu, Jul 19, 2018, 12:47 PM

030 – Mon, Aug 28, 2017 at 6:21 AM

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052 – Wed, Nov 1, 2017, 8:08 PM

Bridge in California (Miranda Hernandez)

102 – Fri, May 11, 2018, 11:56 AM

Adrian's Elephant at Thanksgiving

062 – Thu, Nov 23, 2017, 1:51 PM

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125 – Fri, Oct 19, 2018, 1:08 PM

Esquimalt Lagoon, Victoria, British Columbia, Canada (Miranda Hernandez)

034 – Mon, Sep 25, 2017 at 8:28 PM

Bench on the California coast (Miranda Hernandez)

078 – Mon, Jan 15, 2018, 11:32 AM

Adrian's Elephant at Adrian and Miranda's old house

050 – Sun, Oct 29, 2017, 1:00 PM

031 – Fri, Sep 8, 2017 at 12:16 AM

008 – 31w6d – One Last Road Trip

Sunset in California (Miranda Hernandez)

073 – Sun, Dec 31, 2017, 5:10 PM

Sunset on the California coast (Miranda Hernandez)

081 – Tue, Jan 23, 2018, 8:29 PM

Street art in Victoria, British Columbia (Miranda Hernandez)

135 – Wed, Aug 28, 2019, 8:04 AM

Miranda Maternity 2 - Feature

011 – 39w6d(1) – What does Mama look like?

Vines, Kaua'i, Hawai'i (Miranda Hernandez)

047 – Thu, Oct 19, 2017, 4:54 PM

Flowers on a fallen tree limb, California (Miranda Hernandez)

054 – Mon, Nov 7, 2017, 8:10 PM

Adrian's Elephant

065 – Sat, Dec 2, 2017, 8:06 PM

Kaua'i coast (Miranda Hernandez)

105 – Mon, May 14, 2018, 9:33 PM

California coast (Miranda Hernandez)

076 – Wed, Jan 10, 2018, 11:47 AM

Miranda and Adrian's Elephant on the California coast (Synch Media)

074 – Sun, Dec 31, 2017, 7:59 PM

Dandelions over Te Ti Bay, Waitanga, New Zealand (Miranda Hernandez)

121 – Mon, Jul 23, 2018, 9:04 PM

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