California coast (Miranda Hernandez)

Sea Lions

Miranda's Story: Bereaved Mother
to a Stillborn Child

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I’ve lived here almost two years, and somehow this is only my second time on this pier. It looks different today — different wildlife; different season. Instead of being alone with my thoughts, I am surrounded by tourists, I am pushing my daughter. I spend most of my days now loving on two creatures who didn’t exist one year and nine months ago. I don’t know if the me from that time would even recognize this was possible.

And that’s not to say I believe this was ordained. Because I don’t believe that life’s “plan” could ever include so much heartache. None of these things are worth it, or part of my reward for waiting. Life doesn’t work that way. Life simply is.

I almost lost a friend to suicide today. I wonder if that’s how I will now remember this pier.

Sea Lions in the sun (Miranda Hernandez)
Sea Lions in the sun (Miranda Hernandez)

💙🐘💙 Miranda’s Story is an account of my pregnancy with Adrian and my life after his death. 💙🐘💙

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