People are leaving me alone. It’s what I asked for, but it feels weird. I wake up in the morning, and I still wait to hear you cry. Sometimes I go hours and don’t think of you at all. I feel disloyal. I feel heartbroken. The tears come out of nowhere, I am drowning in them. I can’t catch my breath, I can’t breathe. Your things are everywhere. I want to crawl into your playpen and sleep. I miss my belly. I miss everything I didn’t get to know with you. My phone beeps. People want me to be okay. My son is dead. How will I ever be okay?
I miss you. I miss your kicks, and getting out of bed to feed you. I even miss the backaches and the constant need to pee. Your life was a promise. I love you so much!
I wake up in the morning, and you aren’t there. This is the worst part of my day.