Adoption is often held up as the “solution” to the “problems” of both child loss and grief. This is an unfortunate misunderstanding and oversimplification. Adoption is a beautiful thing. It is not, however, easy or automatic, or guaranteed. There is definitely no “just” about the process.
Children are not replaceable. I know you probably don’t think they are…
I know you probably don’t think you can grab one baby out of a parent’s arms and then give them a different one with no consequence. (You DON’T think that, right?)
But this is what we are sometimes hearing.
I have 2 children: 1 living, and 1 living in an urn. It’s a hard way to parent, & I’m still doing it. I have moments, though, where I wonder if I am enough for her. Will she understand when she’s older? Will she understand what it means to have a deceased brother? Will she ever resent him or me?